The red carpet treatment

4am Wednesday 21st May 2008

Today we got to experience some of the glitz of Cannes. We were originally going to enter the 24 Hour Film Challenge which was held on Saturday but there is only so much you can do in one day, and we were still reeling from the journey. But Andy was invited to be part of the panel judging the contest and today was the day. As usual we were in a mad rush to get everything ready, time just vanishing through our fingertips. And then disaster! We were all in the van ready to go when Stu noticed our campsite swipecard wasn't in its usual place in a pocket on the dashboard. And so began a half hour search for the card. The van was turned upside down and as the last person to use the card, I wildly rifled through all the clothes in my room (not unlike the rigmorol I go through every morning before work!). It was nowhere to be found. Painfully late by this stage, we got a replacement from reception (50 euros!), then a few minutes down the road, eagle eye Stu noticed there was a hole at the back of the dashboard pocket and, on closer inspection, I located the card wedged behind the dashboard. Huge relief.

But we were not out the woods. We had huge difficulty finding the villa where the film ceremony was being held and drove round inanely narrow hilly roads before arriving 2 hours late. Then came the problem of trying to park. Having a big yellow van and a charismatic Stu has many advantages - the security guy told us to park in front of the villa and said he would watch it for us. Result!

Of course today would be the day that I chose to wear a faded black dress with a hole in the side and let my hair dry into a frizzy puffball. We walked through the gates, up the red carpeted stairs and sweeping steps to the villa, past the pool and plastic ladies in slinky dressesm and into the hall where the films were being shown. And where there was a huge mirror reiterating just what a state I looked. To our right was a bar. A free bar. Serving free cocktails, aptly named 'red carpets'. Of course we indulged. I'm sure there were some amazing films shown, but we must have been too late and had to endure a tedious and cringeworthy soft porn short about a couple getting amorous on a staircase.

The villa may have had free cocktails and a swimming pool, and ladies with enormous chests but at our evening screenings we have free wine (red, white AND rose!) and beer and great films. And the naked ladies in our films (not that there are that many, don't get the wrong impression!) are stunning and real and our audience sit in silent appreciation of the beauty on screen rather than smirking at smutiness. So I was happy to go back down the hill and begin our 5th night on the Croisette.

Cath xxx